In the Open
by MarieGirl
Summary: As his sneior year starts Kyle thinks it may be "his year." He has big hopes for he and his boyfriend. But he'll come to find that sometimes things are harder than you hope they will be. Rated M for later chapters, a Style romance. Based off of "Bare."
1. Epiphany

A.N. This is the first chapter of a long Stan/Kyle story. If the story line seems familiar, then you and I should be best friends. This is based on "Bare: a pop musical." I have taken some creativity with it, and I plan on making the chapter titles the song titles from the show, though one song may be skipped here and there for plot reasons. Obviously the characters are not mine either, except for Mindi, they are the work of the amazing people behind South Park.

The boy walked into the high school with his messenger bag hanging by his side. With each graceful step the bag would bounce against his leg and he could feel his books pound together. It was the first day of senior year, the first day of a year of 'lasts.' He pushed his long red hair from his eyes and looked up towards the sign hanging above the freshman hall as he walked by; 'Don't Worry, Nothing Much has Changed.' The irony made him laugh, as if the change from middle to high school wouldn't be a big change for them, as if things in their lives wouldn't change now. Hell in the last three years everything had changed.

The start of the new school year always made Kyle think about his life, what all had happened over the summer and the years previous. He and his friends were so changed it wasn't even funny. As he approached his locker he thought of the biggest change that everyone in school knew, Cartman. The once horribly obese little boy was teased so badly in sixth grade by the eighth graders he went on a diet._ Well,_ Kyle thought, _more like his mother forced him on a diet for his mental health. _Turned out Cartman wasn't big-boned in anyway. It took him until the beginning of Junior year but diets, fat camps, and exercise paid off for him. Cartman was almost _hot,_ Kyle thought- hating himself a little for thinking the word. But it was true, Cartman grew taller without the extra weight holding him down. Now 6'1" he had muscle definition and a body to kill for. When his weight melted away so did some of his bitterness for the world around him as well. _He's still an ass, just a popular hot sort of ass now._ Kyle almost slammed his locker door shut in frustration with his own mind. Cartman had really found himself in high school. He had some of the best grades in school, though nothing in comparison to Kyle or Wendy's. But, much to Cartman's advantage he had learned some charisma over the last few years, people flocked to him; he joined clubs, was at every party, and never seemed to be alone. The whole school had notice Cartman, _and Cartman certainly loves the attention, _Kyle thought to himself.

When Kyle got to his homeroom no one else was there. Even the teacher had seemed to leave the room, but there was a note written in dry erase marker on the board. 'Kyle please take role for me if I'm not back in time, no excuses for being late, give them tardies –Mr. Richards.' Kyle smiled knowing he was so trusted by his educators, anytime a teacher or principal needed something they always went to Kyle. He picked up the eraser and got rid of the message before sitting in Mr. Richards's rolling chair in the front of the room. Kyle looked to the ceiling as he thought about the biggest change in his life, the secret nobody knew about. He smiled to himself at how good he was at keeping a secret he didn't even want to keep.

"Ky," Kyle heard Stan's voice call from the doorframe. Stan closed the classroom door and walk towards him, "how long have you been in here? I was looking for you."

"Sorry, I just came to set my stuff down by Mr. Richards left me a note and I'm taking roll so I have to be here before the bell. But I'll see you in twenty minutes in first hour."

"Yeah, unless you avoid me then too." Stan joked, but Kyle was always bad at picking up on his jokes.

"Hey, I'm not avoid-"

"Ky, I was joking. I'll see you soon."

Kyle made a goofy face at Stan. After so many years of being such great friends he assumed Stan knew not to joke with him. Before even two seconds went by Stan placed his hand under Kyle's chin and lifted his face to meet his. Then he planted a small kiss on Kyle's lips and without any other words left the room, re-propping the door open on his way out.

Kyle smiled again thinking of his secret, and how good he had been at holding all his emotions inside. Stan wasn't ready to tell people, in fact there were times that Stan didn't even seem the least bit gay. But they had been together since the end of freshman year. Nothing serious at first. Till the previous year they hadn't acted all that different around each other, it was only last year that they progressed to anything more than a light peck on the lips. Kyle still smiled though, because even though it was slow progress, even though no one else knew, he was Stan's and Stan was his.

*Stan shoved Kyle's head onto the pillows of his bed. He laughed as the boy's red curls flipped into all the wrong places. They were carefree just watching television. Stan still wore his hat and Kyle still wore his same jacket. They were both growing up though, both maturing. They'd be in high school in just six months. Kyle couldn't help but think the carefree days were going to be over soon.

"Stan do you ever think about growing up?"

Stan thought for a moment, "Well I guess so, I mean doesn't everybody?"

"But, have you thought about your future? Like where you want to be, who you want to be with. What do you think about?" Kyle asked with hesitation in his voice.

Stan didn't respond right away. Kyle assumed he was taking a moment to try and picture his future right then and there. Kyle had always been the one to think ahead. Stan lived in the moment, never worried about the years to come.

"Jeez, I guess I see myself out of South Park, anywhere, as long as it isn't South Park. I can't really say who I want to be with though, I haven't met a girl who I like that much. But I want you in my life, That's about all I know."

Kyle frowned a little, from thought not disappointment. He wondered if he should say something, he wondered what would be a safe thing to say. Suddenly wishing he lived in Stan's world, never worried about anything but the current moment.

"Will you always be there for me, dude? Like even if I do something really weird?"

Stan looked at him funny. It was the only answer Kyle would get, but they knew each other well. Kyle could tell Stan was just waiting for him to say what he would say. As Stan's face lightened its look Kyle took a deep breath. He was nervous, more nervous than ever before.

"Like what if I said, what if I said I had a secret that only you can know? A secret I only trust you with, not even my family, especially not my family can know."

"Dude, you know I will always be there for you. No matter what, you're my best friend."

Kyle paused, "Maybe not for long though. I'm gay, Stan. Not even like I think I'm gay. More of a I've known since I was twelve and accept it now sort of gay. But I'm not a dance around flamboyantly, or wear girl clothes gay, just like… I like guys gay."

Stan didn't know what to tell his friend. He didn't know what response to go with. Should he ask how Kyle could think they wouldn't be friend because of that. Should he say that he's known since they were twelve that Kyle was gay. Should he tell him that he is thrilled that Kyle would come out to him. As Stan thought the silence grew and before Stan knew it too much time had passed. Kyle had been waiting on something, and took Stan's silence as utter horror. Kyle grabbed his jacket from Stan's desk chair. As he made his way to the door Stan jumped up.

"Shit dude, sorry. I didn't realize I was thinking so long. Why would you even be that worried about how I would react? You're my best friend, Ky. And I love you as long as you don't date some idiot." Stan joked.

"What you think I'd be attracted to idiots?" Kyle was offended, he could see nothing worse than being attracted to an idiot; except maybe like Cartman.

"Dude, I was joking. We've really got to help you learn to understand a joke. I think most gay men will tell one, at least every once in a while. You had better be more prepared." Stan and Kyle both smiled at this, Kyle laughed slightly then hit Stan's head down towards the pillows on the bed before sitting back down on the foot of the bed.

"Thanks dude, for being there for me, and being a friend."*

The bell for homeroom brought Kyle out of his flashback daydream. He scrambled to write the names of the people who weren't in the class as of the bell, as well as the names of those not sitting in a chair. He knew Mr. Richards had strict instructions to be in a seat at the bell. Once Kyle finished his list he just set the piece of paper back onto Mr. Richards's desk and took a seat in a desk himself.

"Sorry you guys," Mr. Richards said as he entered the room and closed the door. "Okay let me read you the announcements from over break and for this week:

Over the summer Wendy T., twelfth grade, and Eric C., twelfth grade, both traveled to California to compete in a national debate which they received first place in. Oh, our very own Bebe traveled to the Midwest and helped build houses, what a great contribution Bebe. And Stanley M., twelfth grade was contacted by four colleges about sports scholarships. Those seem to be the only people that told the school what they did over the summer. If any of you, besides Bebe, have a good story you can share it in a few minutes. This week the school…" Kyle started to slowly drown out the sounds of the classroom.

*"Are you feeling okay, Stan?" Kyle asked his best friend with concern.

Stan just sighed. He had gone back into an emo phase. Kyle wasn't even sure what all to say to him, he just wanted him to put on a bright color and smile, or even just act alive. But Stan just sat in his room staring at the pictures on the wall.

"Okay dude, I'm taking these down. You can't come into your room and see these every day, it's just depressing."

Kyle walked over to Stan's walls and started removing photos. There was one large frame that held four photos in it. Each picture was of Stan and Wendy, in one Stan was kissing her forehead while she smiled, in another they both were laughing, one was just a nice smile while they hugged each other, and they last picture both of them held up one hand and together they formed a heart shape in front of them. Kyle stopped to look at the picture, sadness overtook his heart. With each picture he took off the wall there was a darker feeling in his chest.

"Kyle I just don't understand. I was perfect for her. I'm on JV football as a freshman, I'm third baseman once baseball starts up, I have beat all of the school swimming records, hell I even rocked at golf when I did that. Why would she dump me? It's almost Christmas, do you think she just doesn't want to be together over the holidays, maybe she'll come back."

Trying to ignore Stan's words Kyle just continued removing pictures from the walls. He put them all in a pile by the bedroom door so he wouldn't forget to take them on his way out.

"Stan, you know I love you, like in a friend way. But I think you could do so much better than Wendy. Any girl who is going to dump you for the reasons she did is just horrible. You shouldn't want to be back together with her. You should be glad she's not around anymore. Stan, you have someone here for you who will always be here for you. Me, I will always be here. Hell Stan, I'd be a better girlfriend at this point."*

"Kyle-boy." The voice rang out in Kyle's ears. He jumped slightly staring at the blonde standing next to his desk. "You planning on going to first hour, or are you just so happy with homeroom you want to stay here forever?"

"Shut up Ken, you are smart enough to know I just spaced out. Why would I stay in homeroom when I could go to a class where I'll truly learn something?"

As Kyle grabbed his bag Kenny started talking to him. They left the room together and walked towards their first hours. Kyle didn't catch much of what Kenny was talking about. They turned into the senior hall and Kyle said his goodbye and shifted towards his locker. Kenny was about to walk away when-

"Kenneth!" it was a shrill voice, harsh and totally earth shattering. "Are you coming over tonight?"

Kenny grabbed the girl's hands. Her name was Mindi, she was a Junior but she had barely been moved up. Kyle had tutored her a lot for a while, and helped make sure she was on the right track. Then he made the horrible mistake of introducing her to Kenny. Within a few months Kyle's tutoring sessions turned into he was homeschooling her because she was too pregnant to go to school. Kenny was stepping up though, or trying to.

"I'm supposed to work at six. Can I come over before then, I'll stop by after too if that's all right. It's not like I'm avoiding, or skipping out Mind, I'm trying to get money to support Ken."

"Fine Kenneth, I'll pick you up outside of school. Don't take a long time talking to your friends, the sooner I pick him up the less money it costs me. And the more time he'll actually see you. Hey Kyle," she said acknowledging that Kyle was anywhere near them. "it's nice to see you. I'm still passing math, I'll let you know if that changes though. See you after school Kenneth, bye Kyle."

Kyle just laughed, "What did I always tell you Ken?"

"Use a condom, and not one that's been in your pocket since we were nine."

Kyle nodded. He patted Kenny on his back before turned away from the senior hall with his books and heading to his next class. Kyle waved bye to Kenny and walked away without much else. He was proud of Ken really. Kyle had watched him fight for rights to help out and see his kid. Hell for the first time ever Kenny went out and got a job. _My friends_ Kyle thought _have changed a fucking lot since middle school._

On the way to his first class Kyle passed Stan's locker, located in the sophomore hall- a wonderful placement for kids who have mostly sports classes. Stan was by his locker with Wendy and Bebe, Kyle could see Wendy rolling her eyes as Bebe handed Stan a piece of paper. Stan was smiling leaning against his locker towards them, yet he managed to turn and lock eyes with Kyle for a moment. Kyle smiled thinking how Stan could always sense him being around.

"Hey fag." Kyle's eyes widened and his head turned quickly to the voice. Even being familiar with the deep boy's voice Kyle still worried, maybe he stared to long or maybe he had made some loving face. "So you know how I have to pass P.E. to graduate, well they are doing a section on swimming. I don't know any proper swimming shit, so all of us should go to the indoor pool and your little boyfriend can teach a few basics, I want to go in looking smarter than the other idiots."

"Whatever Nazi, it's all up to them. I'll go wherever. Just talk to Stan, if you can pry him away from Bebe." Kyle added the last bit hoping Cartman would stop with the boyfriend jokes so no one would find out for real.

Cartman just nodded, Kyle assumed he meant he'd talk to Stan about it. Kyle walked into his class and it felt like all eyes were on him. Maybe it was because Cartman had loudly called him a fag just feet away from the room. Maybe he just had something in his teeth, _that doesn't even make sense I'm not showing my teeth. _Kyle started towards his desk and sat down in the same spot as usual. Stan soon followed in, the paper from Bebe still in his hands. He passed Kyle and gave him a playful punch in the arm before sitting behind him in the desks.

"We just got invited to a party later on. Bebe's parents are going out of town after Christmas. She's keeping it small, but it's going to be crazy. She says that she and Wendy have already been planning for like a week. Should be pretty good."

"By, we got invited, do you mean you got invited. But then realized they weren't planning on inviting me per say and invited me yourself?"

"However you want to look at it. Point is, our year is set."

Kyle laughed slightly, doubting their year was set because of a party that wouldn't take place for months. But Stan's excitement grew on him and he smiled. It was hard to see the bad side of things with Stan there to push him to the positive. Kyle had already known Stan's year was set, but he figured it wouldn't kill him to attend one social gathering to try and seem like a normal kid for a while.

"Maybe you're right. I know I've enjoyed the year so far." Kyle said winking at Stan. In one hour they had already made out outside of school, and then kissed in school. It was looking like a good year.

A.N. So there it is, the first chapter. I would love for people to R&R. I am really excited for this story!


	2. You and I

AN. Okay, I'm submitting this earlier. But know that may mean you have to wait over a week for the next chapter. My plan is to sumbit every Sunday, but someone asked me. So here it is. Just a reminder I don't own the characters, they belong to South Park creators, also the storyline is based off of Bare: a pop opera, and each chapter title is a song title from the earlier mentioned show. I hope you all still like it :)

At the end of the day Kyle walked with Kenny towards the parking lot. Both boys had books and notebooks filled with homework. The two had become somewhat of study buddies. Kyle had told Kenny it was his personal mission to get him to go to college. So every school day for the last two years the two would see each other or talk on the phone about their homework. _In a way I guess Ken is my new best friend now that Stan is something more… _Kyle thought to himself as they reached the parking lot.

"So dude, I'll call you after I take care of Little Kenny and we can figure out what to do about tonight's homework."

"Sounds good, Ken." Kyle waved at him as he rushed towards Mindi's car.

Kyle was slowly making his way over to Stan's car. For his fifteenth birthday Stan's dad had bought him a brand new car. It was a nice car, not one of the best in the world, but the best of all the teens in South Park. Stan and Kyle both learned how to drive in that car. Kyle thought back to the day Stan got it, he had called Kyle right away to tell him so excited about being able to just leave if he wanted to.

*"Of course anywhere I go I'll take you with me. Now that you know, we're like… you know."

"If you can't even say it…" Kyle started.

It had been like this for the entire beginning of their relationship, Stan just couldn't bring himself to say they were boyfriends. Kyle could understand not wanting to tell people right away, but there was nobody else on the phone with them.

There was a long pause he could hear Stan breathing, and in the background he heard typing. Obviously Stan was distracted with something, that's how it always seemed to go. They would start to have a conversation about dating the Stan would become preoccupied and not be able to talk anymore.

"Listen," Kyle said with intentions of changing the topic, "I'm super stoked about the car. I can't wait to see it. You totally need one with how much stuff you do in school and everything. You deserve it! What color is it?"

"It's deep red. Listen I have to go. I have plans. So I'll be seeing you tomorrow at school. I guess we can hang after." With that Stan hung up the phone.*

Kyle thought for a moment then remembered why he didn't think of that day very often. It sucked to find out the next day that Stan ditched talking to him to drive illegally over to Bebe's to show her and Wendy his new car. Kyle pushed the memory away however, because that was the past, and this was the present.

When Kyle was in the car and buckled Stan pulled away from the school without a word. He didn't say anything the entire ten minute drive to the neighborhood. Kyle didn't mind the silence, but then he watched as Stan drove right passed the Marsh's house. He pulled into Kyle's driveway and Kyle sat there stunned momentarily.

"I have practice." Stan said with a tone that said he wanted Kyle out of his car. "Listen I'll call you later. Right now I have a football practice to go to and then I have to go to a swimming meeting after that. I really need to get going. I'll call you."

Kyle leaned towards his boyfriend and kissed his cheek. Stan pulled away slightly. Kyle knew it was because they were outside of his house. Stan's house was one thing, his parents were never there, and when they were they never paid attention. Whereas Kyle's mother had nothing better to do than wait by the window and watch for her two baby boys to come home.

Kyle waved at the car as Stan pulled away. Stan smiled but that was about it. He wasn't as affectionate as Kyle was. There were days Kyle felt like he must be suffocating Stan. The All-State jock wasn't one to hold hands or cuddle; he had no girly side to him at all. Kyle knew that, it was one of the things he loved about him. He was a man all the way through, down to his very core.

As Kyle walked in the front door he knew his mother had to be somewhere close by. The front door had been unlocked for him, which his mother would never allow. Kyle closed and locked the door then walked towards the kitchen. He wanted nothing more than to find Ike waiting for him instead of his mother. When he walked to the kitchen archway he saw his mother sitting at the kitchen table. Her face was stained with tears and she had a half finished bottle of wine sitting next to her. Kyle sat down, knowing she couldn't have gotten this far into the wine had it been because she saw him kiss Stan's cheek.

"Mom?" he asked quietly.

"He's extending the job. They gave him a choice to work online from home or stay there. Oh bubba I don't think he's ever coming back." Her voice cracked as she said the words and more tears ran down her face.

Kyle didn't know what to say. His father was an ass that pretty much summed it all up. But he knew his mother kept on hoping each and every day that Gerald would change his mind and come home. Not that they were separated or even nearing a divorce but Kyle's mother wasn't stupid.

Six months earlier his parents had started fighting, just about little things. Then the little things turned into big things and the fighting never stopped. Kyle had thought it was very convenient for a job opportunity to arise during all of their problems. There was a case they needed a good strong lawyer for, and so they called on Gerald. He told his family it was to get more money to help them continue living in the lifestyle they had become accustomed to. But he would be in California for who knows how long, and they needed to stay behind because Kyle and Ike had to finish school out with their friends. _He never cared about my friends before_ Kyle thought to himself.

"Why doesn't he want to be with us anymore bubba? I know we had our fights, but I wasn't that horrible to him was I?"

Kyle didn't feel like he could honestly answer. Because the truth was neither of his parents ever showed any affection towards each other. They seemed stone cold when it came to each other. Kyle wasn't sure how to answer his mother without upsetting her more. He couldn't say any of his true feelings, and he didn't have the heart to lie. So he just hugged his mother and left her in silence.

As he walked into the living room he passed the family shrine. It was the wall right by the staircase. Every inch was covered in pictures. Ike and Kyle when they were little, family pictures, wedding pictures, and random pictures of the family doing things together. As he looked at the frames he saw his father smiling in every picture. His father, looking as happy as can be just months before leaving. The images made him tear up, he missed his father.

When he got into his room he turned the television on and flipped through channels. Every few seconds glancing back at his phone. He muted the television and grabbed his phone from the stand. As he dialed his father's number he knew it could be a bad choice. Yet he let the phone start to ring, then keep ringing.

"Hello, you've reached Gerald," it was a woman's voice and Kyle assumed it was an answering machine, "who is this?"

Kyle was stunned, he pulled his phone from his ear and double checked the number. It was his father's home phone.

"Who are you?" Kyle asked the woman.

"I'm Gerald's personal secretary. If you'd like to leave a message I'll need your name."

"It's his son, Kyle. Don't bother, he won't call back." Kyle pressed the end button and threw his phone back onto his bed.

_A woman_ he thought, _a woman at my father's house._ He didn't want to over think anything, or make assumptions, but it didn't look great for his dad at the moment. He glanced back at the phone shook his head and turned back to the television. He tried to just watch the show without thinking of anything in particular.

When his phone rang it was a nice break from the thoughts in his head. He jumped to his phone and looked at the caller ID. He pushed the talk button and smiled as he answered.

"Hey Ken! Are you done visiting my should have been god-son?"

With a laugh Kenny responded, "Yeah I just left. I have an hour before work. Is that okay?"

Kyle laughed a little. Kenny knew he could come over anytime. Kyle would wake up at two in the morning if that was the only time there was to help him. In the past Kyle stayed up all night just because Kenny wasn't sure when he'd be over. Kenny wasn't calling to make sure it was okay, he was just calling to call. Kenny loved having a phone so much he just wanted to use it.

"You know its fine. I'll see you in a minute."

The minute was extremely short. Kenny walked into the bedroom just after hanging up. He smiled at the redhead and threw his backpack on the floor. His first move was to walk to Kyle's closet and rummage through the shirts that were hung up. He grabbed a plain black shirt and after pulling off his tight blue shirt threw on Kyle's.

"Why's do you wear clothes that are so tight you sweat? I think I've lost half my clothes because you steal them."

"But being my only gay friend you have a better sense of style than anyone else, maybe I just want to steal your clothes."

Kyle shot Kenny a dirty look, "Be careful what you say Ken. You can't go saying stuff like that while we're in my house."

"Oh come on, your mom is downstairs almost done with a bottle of wine, your brother isn't home yet from school, and if anyone heard me I'd just make a joke and say I wish. Everyone knows my bi ass wishes you were gay. Then everyone would laugh and drop it."

"You've thought about this way too much."

"Well you're way too nervous."

Kyle couldn't argue with him. He knew that if people found out he was gay it wouldn't be long before they found out about Stan. The thought of Stan being forced to confront the world before he was ready scared Kyle. Stan was socially and physically really strong, but his mental and emotional strength weren't to par.

Stan was a wonderful boyfriend, but Kyle didn't think he could handle being open about it all yet. For now it was easier if no one knew about either of them. Kenny was the only person besides Stan that knew Kyle was gay. It had taken a lot for Kyle to tell him, he debated over it for months. In the end he realized they were best friends, they told each other everything recently and Kenny needed to know. So now Kyle worried about Ken figuring Stan out, but he trusted Kenny.

"Ken, what do you need help with tonight? We don't have long before you go to work."

Kenny pulled out an English paper. Kyle knew which one immediately. It had been assigned during the summer for some of the classes. It was a basic paper, but it was due by Friday. Kyle gave Kenny a look, disappointed he hadn't worked on anything since they got the letter in the mail about the paper.

"Hey I've got a title, that's a pretty good start."

Kyle grabbed the paper from him. All that was written on the paper was: Secrets, the Death of America. Kyle was confused slightly, the assignment was about suicide awareness. It had been assigned over the summer after a student shot themselves.

"How does this title apply Ken?"

"Think about most suicides are caused from people holding things in, not letting the world know the truth. They don't talk about how hurt the bullying makes them feel, or how alone they are, or how scared they are, and in some cases they just don't tell the world who they are at all."

"You think I'm going to kill myself because South Park doesn't know I'm gay?"

"Not you," was all Kenny said before he took his paper back.

Kyle didn't need to help Kenny much. He wrote the paper on his own in the hour that he had with Kyle. All Kyle really did was agree to keep it and proof read it that night. Kenny wasn't good with grammar or spelling. Their English teacher, Ms. Harp, was a bitch about those sorts of things. So Kyle read through the paper once Kenny had left. He circled a few words, and made some notes about sentences, but the ideas and the paper itself was wonderful. He smiled knowing Kenny had actually learned something from him in the last few years.

It was late when Kyle finally started settling into bed. He plugged his phone in and laid down. He was upset that he had never heard from Stan. He should have gotten a call soon after Kenny left. Just as he glanced over at his phone it lit up, Stan's name flashed on the front.

"Hey," Kyle said as he put the phone to his ear.

"Sorry, I'm really sorry. I didn't think about sending you a text. We finished practice late so I had to have a private meeting about swimming. When I got home I did my homework and I was tired so I fell asleep. I'm sorry I didn't think."

Kyle smiled, even though he had been ignored all day hearing Stan's voice cheered him up. He no longer cared that Stan hadn't sent a text or called. His night turned around with just the first word he heard from Stan's mouth.

"It's all right. I totally understand. Thanks for calling now. That was sweet of you. You're sweet in general."

"Okay. Sorry it's late, go to sleep." Stan said in a kind and soothing voice.

"Okay, goodnight. I love you."

"Love you." Stan said and hung up the phone.

Kyle smiled as he set the phone down. He knew that Stan wasn't perfect. But he at least could make things right, he never left messy ends for them to worry about. They would always go to bed happy with each other. He never once went to sleep worried about where they stood with each other, never once did he wish things during the day had been completely different. When it came ot him and Stan, things just seemed right.

AN. Okay, so there it is. Chapter Two. I hoep you guys are enjoying it so far. R&R, let me know how I'm doing even if it isn't all the best comments, I will really love to hear from you.


	3. Role of a Lifetime

AN. In case you haven't realized the * means it is the past, a sort of memory. Hopefully that hasn't been too confusing for anyone. I truely hope that people are liking this story. It's only been up for a few weeks and I know I'm not that far along in the plot, so I haven't heard much about it. I would love reviews to let me know what you think. Also I responded about the review to update, which I plan on doing once a week. Now I'm addressing my grammer issues. Grammer has always been my weakest point. Hopefully it isn't so bad that you can't understand. I tend to write some things how I would say them, which isn't always properly. I truely hope you enjoy this chapter...

*"Kyle, I'm just not ready for something that serious yet. Hell, we're both still young and we just got together a few months ago. Don't make me feel pushed." Stan said.

"I'd never push you. I just thought since we're home alone all night…"

"Not yet, maybe not for a long time I'm sorry," Stan said, "I love you, more than anything. I really do. But I'm not comfortable with that yet. We're only sixteen; we'll only be juniors after the summer ends. Doesn't that seem young to start something so serious?"

Kyle pushed Stan's black hair from his face and laid down in the bed next to him. He scooted closer to Stan, but remained a distance away. They hadn't had sex yet, after a year of dating they hadn't had sex. Kyle knew Stan was right though, they were young. People started having sex so early in life, but they were still young, they could wait.

"I'll wait forever for you."*

Kyle woke from his dream remembering the conversation he and Stan had over two years ago. The topic still applied. He frowned a little thinking of how they hadn't had sex. They had slept together, but never had sex. Here were nights he would stay at Stan's and they sleep next to each other with nothing on, yet they still didn't have sex.

During junior year Stan finally allowed Kyle to take the relationship to another level sexually, but that level only included giving head. Stan hadn't given Kyle head since they first started doing it. Kyle was still waiting for something more. He stood by his statement though, he would wait for Stan forever.

When they first started dating he never imagined it would be a secret at all, let alone for as long as it had been. He also never thought Stan wouldn't want to have anything to do with sex. Yet they had a good relationship.

Kyle turned in bed wiping his eyes and stretching. He looked at his phone which was flashing a little red llight.

"Shit," he said grabbing his phone from his nightstand.

Sender; Ken M.

Received; 6:32 am

Dude u up? I really want u to come with me today. Txt back.

Kyle glanced at his clock. _Six-forty, not too bad I could text back and not seem like an ass. _Kyle thought to himself as he pressed respond. He messaged back that he'd be outside in ten minutes. After sending his message he leapt from bed.

His closet was full of different types of clothes, but nothing he owned was professional looking. He felt like he needed to look like an adult today. He pulled out a blue striped button up, with a nice pair of jeans and decent looking shoes, he could pull of business casual.

Even as he wasted time thinking of his outfit he knew Kenny wouldn't care. Kenny wanted him there for moral support, not for backup. Kenny just needed a friend there to hold his hand after the day was said and done. They were going to court, it was more of a simple meeting rather than a full blown case. Kenny was fighting for more rights to see his son. Mindi wasn't giving him all the rights he had been granted. Kyle was going with him, to Kenny's knowledge it was only to be a shoulder to lean on, but more so to be a third party witness to Mindi's treatment of Kenny and little Ken since the school year had started.

It was mid October, South Park was cold with a wind that was unforgiving. The orange leaves had already fallen to the ground. It was normal to see snow in the fall if you lived in South Park. But it was also very disappointing. The town could be pretty when it was green and things were living. When winter came and killed all the plant life it killed the life inside the people as well.

The kids of South Park would soon be decked out in complete winter gear. Some were already bearing winter coats and heavier shirts. Kyle assumed he would be cold if he walked out in his light clothing. He flew down the stairs, skipping two at a time, and found his mother.

Sheila was in the kitchen, as usual, it was her sanctuary from all that was going on in their home. There she baked and cooked all day long till she was forced to bed by her sons. Ike was already sitting at the breakfast table. There were multiple plates surrounding his area at the table. He glanced at Kyle with a desperate look begging for help.

"Mom," Kyle said carefully as he entered the room, "I have to go this morning. I'll be at court for a while."

"Oh that's fine. Good luck on your case Gerald," Sheila paused and turned to her son. She had tears in her eyes and she dropped her spatula on the floor, "I'm sorry Bubba, Hearing court… it was a habit. Why are you going to the courthouse?"

Kyle sat at the kitchen table. He grabbed the fork set out for him and started eating some of the food set out in his place. He figured if he had to explain he might as well get some food. He took large bites and half chewed them before swallowing. As he took bites he talked.

"Kenny needs to go, and before you say anything he isn't in any trouble at all. Mindi, the girl he had a baby with, she's been out partying and still hasn't found a job. Despite the fact that Kenny provides everything but a roof over little Ken's head she barely lets him visit anymore. I said I would go to be a support system for him."

Kyle looked up to his mother, cheeks puffed out from the food in front of him. She had her elbow propped up on the kitchen counter. Her hand was gently covering her mouth as she smiled at him. She slowly walked towards him and placed her hand on his wavy red locks.

"You are a good person, Bubba." She said kissing the top of his head, "Now get going, you have good friend duties to be doing. I'll be fine here with Ike, don't you worry."

Kyle smiled, after swallowing his last bite. He stood up and hugged his mother. As he melted into the comfort of his mother's embrace he had a thought. Suddenly he worried his mother would not think of him as a good person if she knew who he really was. The thought shook him, causing him to jolt from his mother's arms. He said a small goodbye and left the room.

As he walked towards the front door he passed the family shrine. Now only covered in pictures of Ike, his mother, and him. Kyle was sure his mother killed herself inside taking the pictures of his father down, but he knew it would be better for her. He smiled thinking that maybe they were getting to a better place.

As Kyle opened the door he remembered the reason he had gone looking for his mother. It wasn't to tell her Kenny's sob story it was to find his coat. Now though, he could see Kenny walking down the road and it was too late to go searching. Kyle just rubbed at his arms slightly, folding them across his chest trying to preserve heat.

"Kenny," he called down the street running toward his friend at the end of the road, "hey sorry my mother stopped me. You know I wouldn't miss this for anything."

Kyle wrapped an arm around Kenny's back and gave him a half hug. They walked in mainly silence towards the center of town. From Kyle's house it was about a twenty minute walk to the courthouse where Kenny's meeting was taking place. Kyle looked over at Kenny, impressed by his clothing, he had on nice black pants and a blue button up.

"Ken, how did you afford those?"

"They were my dad's from like eons ago. He yelled that he wasn't a square and didn't want them anymore, so I stole them from him. That way I have nice clothes for work and didn't spend my pay check on them."

Kyle smiled at Ken. Kenny's whole life had been filled with so much bad, he had such a hard life, but he had really turned out to be a good person. He was Kyle's only escape besides Stan, the only other person that made any sense in the whole damn town. Kyle reached for Kenny's hand and smiled at him when Kenny took it.

"If it's too gay for you dude, I just… I don't even know." Kyle stuttered.

"Naw, it's just gay enough dude."

Kyle laughed a little as they walked down the road together towards town. They didn't have t worry about people's stares, mainly because it was morning, but also because Kenny had always had a good talent of getting people to look away. Kyle admired how secure Kenny could be, even though it was like on one knew him. Kyle wished everyday he could feel secure. But he only felt that way around Stan, or Kenny.

It was almost seven thirty by the time the two boys walked into the courthouse. Kenny ran ahead to the secretary so he wouldn't be late. Kyle walked slowly behind him, watching Kenny's moves. At one point he motioned back to Kyle then turned back to the woman. Kenny nodded and motioned for Kyle to hurry with him. Kenny led him to an elevator, the door closed and he pushed three.

"You can't go in the actual room with us. But she said it was good I brought someone, it looks nice to have support. Plus if you wouldn't mind now someone can keep little Ken outside the room. And all the bags and everything. The longest she and I are allowed to be in there is till nine, so hopefully she isn't in a huge fighting mood. I'm sorry you woke up early just to sit outside the room."

The elevator door opened and Kenny led Kyle to the right where they both saw Mindi, sitting alone with the car seat. She didn't look happy in the least, if anything she looked a little dead. Her eyes were half closed and a little red. She wore ripped jeans and a wrinkled tee shirt. As they neared they could smell vomit and alcohol. Kenny held his nose slightly, Kyle held back a gag. Mindi was swaying in her seat and cooing at little Ken in his car seat.

"Kenny, she looks really bad." Kyle said with concern.

"This is how she has looked, and smelled for a month now. She was wearing that same outfit two days ago when I tried to see Ken. She's a mess, that's why I had to do this."

At seven forty five a man in a black suit opened the door they had been waiting in front of. He motioned at Kenny and then looked around. Kenny turned to Mindi and motioned at her. The man's eyes widened, and then quickly returned to emotionless. Kyle waved to Kenny as he entered the room his smile faded as the large wood door closed.

"Hey there little Ken," Kyle said as he lifted the blanket from the top of the car seat, "Oh god."

Little Ken was wearing only a thin white one piece outfit. It was something a baby could only wear for the hottest week of the summer in South Park. Kyle figured he must be freezing. He slowly unbuttoned his nice shirt, and took it off. His plain white tee shirt underneath made him look shabby but he was able to unhook Ken and wrap the shirt around him.

As he held Ken in his arms he thought of when they were all younger. Back to elementary school, when none of them wanted kids, no one thought of grown up issues, and when girls seemed icky to everyone. It was odd for Kyle to think of Kenny as a father, especially before everyone else. Stan would have made a terrific father, at least if he had a sports kid. Wendy would have made a great mother to any snobby little girl. Then he thought of himself, he never had picture himself as much of a father, but he still wouldn't have imagined Kenny having a child before him.

Little Ken smiled up at Kyle, reaching his hand up to Kyle's hair. Kyle bent his head down and allowed Ken to pulled at his locks. While sitting in the chair he felt his pocket vibrate. He carefully held Ken with one arm, then reached for his phone with his other hand.

Sender; Stan M.

Received; 8:10 am

Hey babe, we hanging today? Come to my house anytime you can.

Kyle smiled reading the text. Stan could be so sweet when he wanted to be. It was easy for him to be kind and gentle, as long as he didn't feel threatened by other people. Kyle loved spending his days at Stan's house, because they could be totally open there, and no one ever noticed or knew anything.

Sent; Hell yeah baby, I'll be there after a while. I'm helping Kenny with something.

Kyle didn't bother putting his phone away. He just placed it on the arm of the chair. Little Ken started fighting Kyle's hold on him. So Kyle set him back down in his seat, with the shirt still wrapped around him. Kyle dug through Mindi's bag and found, not only an empty bottle of jack, but one toy for Ken. Right as he gave Ken the toy he saw his phone light up as it vibrated against the chair.

Sender; Stan M.

Received; 8:14 am

Jeez, should I be worried about all the time you spend with Ken? I'm jk-ing you. Don't worry. I'll see you later.

Kyle didn't respond, he didn't see a real need to. He just put his phone back away and sat back in the chair. Watching little Ken was very interesting. He was so little and entertained by the oddest things. Kyle searched for a clock, not wanting to pull out his phone again. It was almost 8:30 he knew that meant Mindi must be fighting hard, though he didn't see how in the state she was in. How could she even be allowed to fight? If Kyle was that judge he'd take one look at her and call off the meeting, send her to jail for being under something as a minor and give Kenny the rights he wanted.

Kyle hadn't heard any noises from the room which seemed to be a good thing. It's not like South Park had sound proof doors, they wouldn't have spent the money. So there couldn't be a lot of yelling going on. Kyle thought only moments too soon. There was a loud thud from the room, and Kyle could hear louder, more urgent talking. Kenny pulled the door open quickly.

"Call Hell's Pass!"

Kyle grabbed his phone quickly and dialed the number. It rang once before someone answered. Kyle said where he was and that an ambulance was needed. The woman on the phone said that was all and hung up, after reassuring that the ambulance was on it's way. Kyle put his phone down on the chair and walked over to Kenny.

"What is it?"

"She's passed out. She had been loopy the entire time. That's why it took so long we couldn't get her to focus. Then she just fell to the floor. I bet you anything, she took too much stuff last night."

Kyle's eyes widened, "What stuff?"

"What stuff doesn't she take? She never used to be this bad. Sure she was from the trailer park just like me, but she wasn't insane."

The man in the suit appeared from the room. The large wooden door was pushed open more. Kyle could see Mindi was lying on her side on the large table in the middle of the room. The man had to have set her there like that, Kyle figured it was too unnatural of a way to fall down. He coughed a little to get attention.

"Well after this meeting, I will be putting paperwork in. Keep in mind it will have to go through the system, so you can't screw up before it's finalized. But after these events, I feel comfortable saying that you will have full custody by the end of the month. And as for now, I grant you will part time full custody while Mindi is in the hospital. However, once she is cleared you will have to return to the normal pattern of things until everything is finalized."

Kenny smiled, "Thank you."

Kyle was so happy for Kenny. He hugged him quickly, but all Kenny wanted to do was see his son. Kenny pulled his son from the car seat, giving Kyle's shirt an odd look. He hugged his son and just sat down and held him. Kyle couldn't help but smile, Kenny was a wonderful parent so far he was loving and caring. Kenny would surely have a few problems now, but they had another day to figure everything out before school.

Once the ambulance arrived the boys had to leave. Kenny hooked Ken into his seat, placed the blanket over him and lifted the seat. Kyle offered to take turns carrying the seat, but he was just as weak as Kenny if not more so. Kenny carried it on his own, saying it was his privilege now, getting to carry his son.

Kyle said goodbye to Kenny and Ken when the road split. He knew that Kenny was sad that he was taking his son to the trailer park he was just released from. Kyle knew Kenny wanted nothing more than to have his son grow up on the right side of town. It almost made him feel guilty as he passed the nicer houses in South Park to get to Stan's. No one on his side of the tracks cared about the house they lived in. Kenny would care though, one day Kenny would really make something of himself, Kyle was sure of it.

Stan's house was nicer than most in South Park, not as nice as Kyle, Token, Bebe, or Wendy's but defiantly up there on the higher middle class status. The yard was a perfect shade of green with beautiful plants everywhere. His mother was always outside gardening, that's all she did was tend to the plants.

Kyle walked up the walk way and Stan's mother didn't even notice him. He walked in the front door and saw Stan's father sitting at the computer like always. He sat in a dark corner in the living room holed up staring at the bright screen. He also didn't notice as Kyle walked by. Shelly walked down the stairs, bumping into Kyle on her way down. She made no motion towards him, she didn't even look in his direction.

Kyle knew why Stan liked his house. He felt completely hidden. He didn't have to worry about his parents noticing how he and Kyle acted together. They were just the two best friends like they always had been. Half the time Stan's parents forgot Kyle's name. It was just easier for Stan to believe no one could be listening, when he knows his family is blind to him.

Kyle didn't bother with knocking on Stan's door. He never did. Stan had told him back in third grae that there was never a need to knock, always walk right in. That was back when Stan's mom would be ready with a plate of cookies, and his father would be sitting on the couch watching the game, or Shelly would be there with a mean word or insult. Now it was just habit, Stan always knew it was Kyle, because he just walked in.

"Hey there." Stan said.

Stan walked up to Kyle and wrapped his arms around him. He kissed his cheek softly and smiled at him. Kyle's eyes lit up as Stan stared at him. There were butterflies that wouldn't stop fluttering around his stomach. Stan was the school's favorite boy, the guy every girl wanted, and here her was kissing Kyle.

Stan kissed Kyle's lips again, this time leading him to the bed. He planted small tender kisses all over Kyle's lips. Stan's hands traveled Kyle's body, exploring everywhere as if he had never seen or felt it before. Kyle could feel his pants getting tighter and tried to stop thinking of the actions they were doing. He knew Stan would stop if he thought Kyle couldn't just walk away. Kyle had to force his mind to think of other things.

It was hard with Stan kissing all over his face. Kyle had to pull away from him. He just looked into Stan's eyes to break the motions. Stan's eyes were warm, filled with love and care that was all for Kyle.

"Stan we should stop now or I won't want to."

Stan sat up on his bed and tussled Kyle's hair to the side. He sat Indian style and leaned against the wall his bed laid next to. He smiled at Kyle and took his hand. Gently he placed a kiss on Kyle's palm.

"I love you." Kyle said, "I feel so lucky to be here with you, to be picked by you. I never would have dreamed I'd be playing this part. I wouldn't have imagined in my wildest day dreams this could happen for me. You make me so happy."

Stan pulled Kyle to him. He unfolded his legs and had Kyle lean against his body. Kyle closed his eyes and drifted to sleep in the embrace of the boy he loved. Stan just rested, holding Kyle in his arms looking down on the boy as he rested, looking peaceful like an angel.

AN. There it is, chapter 3; Role of a Lifetime. In case anyone was wondering about filler chapters, I don't relly plan on having any. Each chapter has a purpose, it may be to give you information on the characters and who they are now that they are grown up, or it may be character development and growth. Either way all of the chapters will have a point. Future chapters may get a tiny bit shorter. Like I said this is based off of Bare and some of the musical numbers are more important than other, though they all are needed... None of this belongs to me, as you know. The character's are South Park's and the story is Bare, with my own little twists...


	4. Plain Jane

**A.N. **_Please remember I don't own these people, and it is based off Bare._

Just a few days later Kyle sat by himself in homeroom. Kenny wasn't with him because he was having trouble figuring out babysitting. Kyle's mother had offered, but in her depressed state Kyle wasn't hot about the idea. His mind couldn't focus on the morning announcements. All he could think about was the fight he and Stan had just the two days after spending a wonderful night together.

*Kyle walked into Stan's room slowly. They hadn't even texted since he slept over the other night. Kyle was worried he might surprise Stan or scare him. He just wanted to make sure things were okay.

"Hey." He called into the dark room.

Stan was lying on his bed looking towards the ceiling. His windows were covered and he had all forms of light blocked, except for the doorway which Kyle was standing in. He wasn't moving besides his chest moving up and down to breathe.

"Stan?" Kyle questioned. He knew Stan often took things and blew them way out of proportion. But he didn't even know what was wrong, there was nothing he knew about that could send him into his emo phase.

"Shut up, and close the door."

Kyle listened, despite Stan's snippiness. He sat on the side of the bed next to Stan and rubbed his head. Kyle smiled at him, even though he couldn't see it in the dark.

"What is wrong?"

"My dad-"

"Oh my god is he okay?" Kyle questioned worried.

Stan hit Kyle's hand away and turned in his bed. He faced away from Kyle, though it didn't matter in the dark, Kyle could still feel that he was away.

"He's an ass. I have been trying my damned best and he won't accept that. Get better averages, have a better game, swim faster, hit harder it never stops. You're lucky your dad ran out."

Kyle turned in the bed. He couldn't believe his ears.

"Never say that again." His voice was firm.

Kyle didn't sound angry or upset, but he was. He wanted to burst into tears that his boyfriend would remind him of such a horrible thing in such a casual way. He wanted to slap Stan for being so hateful towards a father who only wanted him to succeed. But most of all he was furious that Stan would let such a small thing bother him so much, like a child.

"I am leaving. Grow up and I'll be waiting for you."*

The bell for homeroom rang loud and clear. Before he could get away Mr. Richard stopped him. Kyle sat back down in his seat. He knew they would wait for everyone else to leave before they even said anything and he knew it wouldn't be praise for spacing out for the morning news. Kyle didn't feel like sitting though, he wanted to go see his boyfriend in hopes that he was better.

"So Kyle, what is going on?"

Kyle didn't know how to explain such a huge answer to such a small question. He couldn't even truly get into anything without talking about his relationship which he knew he couldn't do.

"I'm just feeling stressed. School work, friends, and I'm trying to help out Kenny a lot too. He has so much going on right now, and so little resources to deal with all his problems. I have a few big papers to write, a few projects due soon, and my mom to take care of. My father left me in charge of the house, and I haven't even been able to find a job yet."

Kyle just started going off about all the small issues in his life, everything that he never considered a problem, but now that it was out loud seemed huge. What if he never got a job and his father stopped sending money. What if his mom got ill, what would happen to him and Ike. What if he didn't get his work one and his grades dropped. Everything besides Stan was starting to seem like a really big problem in his life, and suddenly Stan acting like a baby didn't seem to matter so much.

"Wow, I didn't realize how much stuff I had bottled inside. Thank you Mr. Richard." Kyle said as he got up and left, not caring if that was the end of the conversation.

In the hall way he saw Bebe walking with Wendy and Stan, they were the school's prime group. Wendy was starting to fall out of the popular group because of her academics, so she made sure to be seen with Bebe and Stan daily. It bothered Kyle sometimes to see Stan be so comfortable with them, especially knowing Bebe would love to boost her popularity more by saying she got with Stan, and the fact that he dated Wendy through for their whole childhood.

Wendy waved at Bebe and Stan as she parted from the line to turn into a different hallway. Stan stopped at a math classroom with Bebe and talked for a moment. Kyle didn't want to interrupt so he stayed behind. Bebe leaned up to Stan and kissed his cheek. She lingered for a few moments, and Stan did nothing to pull away.

Kyle watched, frustrated as Bebe walked into class and Stan's eyes followed her. He walked up and grabbed Stan's arm.

"What the fuck was that?"

"Calm the hell down, Kyle. I can't help that girls like me. You need to chill, we agreed to act normal till we were out of this town. Well normal wouldn't be pulling away from her kissing my cheek, that would be lame. Why are you freaking out, you're acting like-"

"Your boyfriend!" Kyle yelled tears swelling in his eyes.

Stan's eyes widened and he looked around quickly to see if anyone who remained in the halls had noticed. No one had looked towards them, or made and sudden movements. Suddenly Stan's looks turned from worried to furious.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing. First you get pissy at me for being upset and now you're screaming shit like that at the top of your lungs. Don't be an ass."

"Sorry for caring, see you in class." Kyle said as he turned around.

He couldn't go to class though, he couldn't bring himself to face the issue that had arisen in his life. He didn't want to face a possible end with Stan. All he could do was walk to the nurse. He had never been to the nurses office to actually say he was sick before. Since he was known for being so good the idiot nurse just took his word that he wasn't feeling well, and wrote him a pass to sign out before first hour.

Kyle walked to the front desk his heart pounding, he had lied. If they looked at him and he seemed fine he wasn't sure what would happen. So all he could do was hold his breath, show his pass and be told to leave the building. As he walked out the front doors he couldn't believe how easy it had been.

His only delay now was where to go from the school. He couldn't go home, because his mother would freak out. She didn't believe in not going to school. Once when Ike was younger she sent him to school throwing up. She would be furious he left with no real reason. He looked at the road from the school, he could head towards town, or go towards the houses and make a choice then.

Kyle just closed his eyes and let his feet take him somewhere. Before he knew it he was crossing the tracks to the bad side of town. He hadn't been to Kenny's in years. He wasn't even sure if he knew how to get there but he was going to try. He watched as the white snow turned into brown snow, then just dirt and mud all together. All plant life seemed to disappear, and instead there were mobile homes set up everywhere one would fit. Kyle searched for one that was a little nicer than the others.

Kenny had been talking about how he fixed his place up. He got a nice new coat of paint, he had planted a few plants outside, and even washed all of the windows. So far there was nothing that looked like that. Kyle kept walking, getting a little afraid of where he was.

"Kyle?" he heard from behind him.

"Kenny, thank god I was lost, I think…"

Kenny led Kyle to his house and took him inside to his room. It was tiny, even tinier now with a crib and toys everywhere. But it was clean and organized. Kyle had never pictured Kenny as the type to take care of their stuff. Suddenly he didn't feel like a very good friend.

"I had to leave, I snapped. This was the only place I could think of to go. Well I thought to go to you, but you were here and I wasn't positive where here was." Kyle laughed slightly.

Kenny lifted little Ken onto the big mattress that laid on the floor. Ken spent his time crawling from Kyle to Kenny, then back again as the two talked. Kenny didn't know the whole story of what was going on, but he could piece a few things together.

"You fought with Stan right? I mean you left before first hour… So I assume your best friend is being stupid and you didn't want to sit through class looking at him."

"Basically." Kyle said, it explained it well enough without going into the details.

Little Ken crawled up on Kyle's lap making Kyle smile. As he played with the baby Kenny just observed him. He watched as Kyle smiled and laugh, he noticed how much of a natural Kyle was with kids.

"Do you ever get sad?" Kenny asked, "Knowing you won't have kids of your own, that is. It must be hard, I can tell you love them just by how you play with Ken. Is it hard? I remember I use to be glad when I first figured out I was bi. I thought I cut my chances in half of having kids. I'm glad I did though, it made me grow up you know?"

Kyle nodded. To be honest he hadn't thought about not having kids. He had never thought about having them in the first place to be upset that he wouldn't have them now. But Kenny was right, he did enjoy playing with little Ken.

"I'll just steal your kid every now and then." He said with a laugh.

Kenny laughed too, although there were times he'd be fine with someone watching the baby, he wanted time off from parenting.

"Kyle, talk to Stan right after school. You guys are best friends. I don't want to see your friendship hurt over a stupid fight. Just go find him and fix it. Remember that he can be dumb and irrational, still just try to fix it."

There was a silence over them. Kyle wasn't sure how to explain without revealing too much. He wanted to say his real problem, his real worry. But he had to be careful.

"I don't feel good enough. Stan hangs out with Bebe and Wendy at school every day. They are the prettiest best girls in town, if I was a girl I'd just be plain Jane. Hell that's how I am now, I just fade away to the background. How am I supposed to stay his… best friend when I am so invisible?"

"You are anything but invisible, dude. Little Ken sees you, and so do I." Kenny said with a smile.

Kyle smiled back at him. He was never worried about being invisible around Kenny. He always felt important, wanted even when he was with Ken. It was a nice feeling to have.

"You're like my best friend Kenny."

Kenny didn't know what to say. He had never had a best friend before. Back in elementary school people considered him to be Cartman's best friend, but he never really liked the asshole. And then in middle school no one seemed to know who he was. In high school Kyle was the only one whoever said two words to him. He never thought he'd have a best friend. It was a luxery for those who were on the other side of town, not for him. His best friend was sex, then Mindi, then Ken. He didn't have a chance to find a real friend.

Little Ken crawled up onto Kenny's lap. Kenny wrapped his arms around his son and kissed his cheeks. He held him tightly in a hug, not letting go for anything.

"I'm scared a lot, Kyle."

Kyle stopped, not sure what to say or how to respond. He didn't understand where it came from, or what it really meant. But looking at Ken, he could see a twinkle behind his eyes, something deep within him trying to get out. Kyle looked at him with concern as Kenny's worries boiled to the surface.

"Of what, Ken? You always seem so carefree. How is it that you are actually scared of something?"

Kenny just sighed. He placed little Ken on the bed beside him and covered him with a blanket. Ken laid down himself, legs still crossed, facing away from his son and Kyle. He wrapped his arms around a pillow and gave out one more sigh.

"Of life mainly. Of all the people I meet and what they think of me. I worry about if I can get out of here. If I can make a better life for me, or him," he said motioning to Ken jr. "I worry every day of my life about the life I'm living. I put on this act to make people feel like I'm strong. I may be scared but I don't need pity because I have nothing. I see the old people of this town give me pity smiles during the winter when I walk around in a too small coat with my same clothes from three years ago.

These people, they are horrible in every sense of the word. They will look down on me for my whole life no matter what I make of myself. Parts of me are determined to prove them, and myself wrong. I think I could become something, show them all. Then maybe they will accept me, and that would surprise me.

Then I think of the life I'm going to live. I'm not going to college, I'm not getting a better job than a cashier. I'm never going to afford living outside the trailer park. I can't make anything out of myself. And to top it all off I'm so confused about me, myself, and I that I'll never find a person to be with forever. Because who wants to marry a boy who sometimes likes girls but may change his mind.

And having Ken just solidified the rough life I have in store. You Kyle, you're going to get out of this town. I'm going to be stuck here forever. Even if you come back here after college to live you still got out. You are going to make something of yourself. You think you're some plain Jane. But you're like a flower Kyle. You have so much time, and one day you'll bloom into something fantastic. Whereas I will wilt away, forgotten by the world around me."

Kenny's arms were wrapped around himself. He was facing the bed, head as down as it could be. His face was twisted as he tried to keep himself from crying. He looked over at his son and tears couldn't help but fall from his eyes.

Kyle didn't know what to do or say. He sat in silence mainly, wishing he knew what to do to help. All he could think of was to say something encouraging, but words seemed to escape him. Kenny had always been so quiet, everyone had assumed he didn't have much to say. But years of bottling in all his frustrations and worries were slowly killing him inside.

Kyle hadn't even noticed how troubled Kenny really was. He saw a tough kid, who was having a hard time. A smart kid without resources to be great. But Kenny was sinking, and no one had paid any attention. Kyle felt horrible, he had become so entranced by his problems with Stan, or his relationship in general that he didn't even notice his friends pain.

"Kenny," he paused thinking of words to say, "I promise I will help you get somewhere in life. You want to be on the other side of the tracks, okay. You want out of this town, fine. I will help you get there. Together we'll get you and Ken out of these mobile homes. I promise."

"I have school work to makeup, if you want to help." Kenny said.

Kyle knew it was a way for Kenny to go back to ignoring his problems. But at the same time it was the first step to conquering his issues. Kenny needed to graduate, to be able to attend college. Kyle had promised to help him pass all of his classes, in a way it was the best way of helping.

Kyle nodded and moved towards Kenny. Kenny stopped him by placing his hand on top of Kyle's. He sat there for a moment looking down at their hands. Kyle's was so girlish, frail almost. It was slender and long. Whereas Kenny had bulk to his hands, they were that of a grown man's. Kenny smiled and looked up to Kyle's face.

Kenny's look was one of friendship, true happiness. He wasn't being mushy or loving towards Kyle. He was just thankful. His smiles were ones that broke through his depressed mind-set. And every breath was one of relief.

"Thank you, Kyle. For everything you do for me."Kenny said smiling and Kyle smiled back at him.

**A.N. **_Okay here is another chapter. I am starting to lag behind with this story. I've gotten into Harry Potter stories a little and haven't written as much as I had hoped on this one. I will be fixing that in the next week. Don't you worry. I am very sad with how few reviews the story has gotten, I'm willing to take people being mean too… any review would do… I do hope you like the story. Please remember I am not perfect, while I do spell check, that doesn't catch everything. And reading back sometimes things seem fine. I know I'm not perfect, so yes grammar and things like that may not be the best._


	5. Wonderland

**A.N.**_ I do not own. The plot is based off of "Bare" I am sorry it took so long to update, I had a funeral and was out of town as a result. This is the start of some more R rated things. I hope I didn't go overboard on detail but also I hope it was enough to satisfy: _

Kyle stood outside of the big red door, he took deep breaths as he looked around. Snow covered the street, and the flowers in the yard were dead. He had goose bumps, and his heart was racing, but it wasn't from the cold. He contemplated knocking, but worried no one would answer the door. He pulled his phone from his pocket and thought of calling, but his calling would be ignored.

He unrolled the sleeves of his green flannel; the hair on his arm was starting to stand straight up. He looked down and his white tennis shoes, kicking at the porch. His hair was falling in his eyes, longer than it had been in a long time.

He was staling, even he knew it. Everything going through his head was just mindless crap to delay his walk inside the door. He thought of everything but the easy effort it would be to just go inside. His mind was wrapped around ideas of anger and fights. He thought of crying, and yelling. Nothing in his mind was positive.

Kenny had made him leave, Kenny told him exactly where to go. But without Ken by his side he didn't feel strong, all his courage melted away. And suddenly he was plain Jane again. Suddenly confronting Stan seemed too hard.

Kyle thought about turning around. He wondered what would happen if he just went home. How would their fight play out if he didn't go in there? Kyle had a million situations running through his head, none of which were wonderful.

Then one good thought popped into his head. The idea of kissing Stan. One kiss that would melt all their problems away. Kyle closed his eyes, ignoring the cold as his imagination ran away. He pictured walking into the room and just kissing Stan, with no words spoken. There would be no need for apologies, no words at all.

Kyle wrapped his hand around the door knob and slowly turned it. He took small, slow steps. Being cautious of who might be paying attention for once. But as he closed the front door he saw no one. There wasn't a soul sitting, standing, or moving around the home.

Kyle was nervous for a moment that Stan might be gone. But his car was out front and he never went anywhere without it. Kyle reassured himself that everything would be fine and moved towards the stairs. The forth step squeaked like it always did if you moved slowly. He paid more attention to how he was walking, gracefully trying to prepare himself to charm Stan away.

Kyle got to Stan's bedroom door and just stood. He looked at the stickers forever attached to the wood, some that he had placed on the door back when they were young and innocent. Kyle found himself unbuttoning his flannel, revealing the blue undershirt he was wearing. He tried to look casual, tried to look calm, but mostly cool.

When Kyle swung the door open he saw Stan sitting at his computer desk. Stan was running his fingers over the keys, not actually hitting anything. He looked upset, worried even. Then he glanced up towards the door. His face lit up and he jumped from his seat.

He ran to Kyle and wrapped his arms around him. Kyle could hear Stan sniffling as they hugged. Kyle was surprised by Stan's reaction. Though he played through many scenarios, this one hadn't crossed his mind. Kyle wasn't sure what Stan was feeling or doing.

"I was so worried. You were just gone and no one knew where you went. I tried calling but your phone wasn't getting any calls. I got so nervous. God I was worried the last thing you'd hear from me was a fight."

Kyle held tighter to Stan, so overjoyed that they hadn't fought, that they weren't yelling, or even upset. He pulled away from Stan's embrace and kissed him, gently.

"I love you, and I am so sorry." Kyle whispered quietly into Stan's ear.

Stan put his hand behind Kyle's head and pulled him close. As they kissed there was more need flowing between them. Stan pushed open Kyle's mouth with his tongue, exploring his mouth. He pulled Kyle close and moved him towards the bed. His hands started wandering Kyle's body, searching every place he had ever touched more carefully.

Kyle backed up to Stan's bed slowly. He sat down, pulling Stan on top of him. They remained there, on the edge of the bed kissing as much as they could. Kyle moved his face from Stan's path quickly, staring up at him.

"I won't want to stop if you keep going."

"I don't want to stop." Stan whispered into his ear.

Stan pushed his mouth onto Kyle's. They broke apart only to gasp for air. Kyle felt Stan's hands wander down the rough material of his flannel. Stan wrapped his hands around Kyle's back and sat him up on the bed. He grabbed his shirt by the collar and pulled him closer into the kiss. Then slowly he pulled the flannel off, throwing it to the side of the bed.

Kyle ran his hands up the inside of Stan's shirt, finding the small part in between Stan's shoulder blades, where he could feel Stan's every move. Stan kissed Kyle's mouth, harder this time. Moving from his mouth to his cheek. From his cheek to his neck. From his neck to his collar bone, which barely showed from under his blue tee shirt. Stan grabbed the collar of Kyle's undershirt with his teeth and pulled at the shirt.

Kyle moved quickly, whipping his hands from under Stan's shirt and grabbing onto his own tee shirt. Stan broke away from Kyle's body momentarily, allowing Kyle to pull his shirt over his head and throw it onto Stan's floor. Kyle laid back, resting on the bed. Stan kneeled above him.

Stan slowly moved his hands to the hem of his own shirt. Pulling it up slowly. Revealing inch by inch his body to Kyle. Though Kyle had seen Stan's body before, it seemed different in the glow of things. Stan's tanned body, his muscles, his happy trail, all of it seemed different.

Stan slowly leaned down, hovering over Kyle's body. He slid his hand under Kyle's back and lifted him from the bed gently. Kyle followed the motion by pushing his feet against the bed. Slowly they moved together, more on the bed than before. Kyle rested his head on the pillows beneath him and Stan lowered his head to meet Kyle's.

All of Stan's muscles stuck out as he held himself up while kissing. Kyle moved his hands over Stan's body and could feel each of his muscles working, harder than they ever had in bed before. Stan clutched at the sheets beneath them as he kissed Kyle's body, moving slowly down his chest, kissing every inch of skin he saw.

"Oh my god Stan." Kyle moaned as Stan kissed over his chest.

Stan moved down with his kisses. Slowly kiss his way down Kyle's bare chest. As Stan reached the line of Kyle's pants his hands traveled south, over the denim between the two boys. Stan ran his hands on the insides of Kyle's thighs, and then lingered over his crouch.

Carefully, slowly Stan unbuttoned Kyle's pants. Releasing the tight bulge from the restrictions of clothes. Stan kissed over Kyle's boxers as he pulled the jeans to Kyle's ankles. He ran his hands up Kyle's bare legs, and pushed his hands up Kyle's boxers. He quickly ran his hand over Kyle, teasing him slightly.

"Fuck, Stan." Kyle whispered in pleasure.

Kyle could feel himself shaking slightly. They had never done something like this; Stan had never been so intimate. When they had fooled around before they would keep clothes on, or remove them quickly just for the purpose of what needed to be done. And when it was over, that was it, clothes went back on they were done.

This though, was something totally different. Stan was being aggressive, and yet being a tease. Kyle could hear his heart pounding, and was sure Stan could too. Kyle could feel Stan run his fingers inside the top of his boxers slowly pulling them from Kyle's body. Kyle lifted his hips slightly helping his clothes slip off his body. Stan guided the boxers to Kyle's ankles, and then pulled the jeans off with them. Slowly he kissed up Kyle's legs, finding his way to Kyle's inner thighs once again. This time his mouth lingered over each kiss, breathing warm air over each spot. He moved just barely with each kiss, dragging out the time before he came to kissing up Kyle's hard cock.

Kyle arched his back and moaned as he felt Stan's mouth around him. Stan moved slowly, pushing his mouth all the way down Kyle's shaft. As he would pull up he'd flip his tongue over Kyle's head. Stan could feel Kyle throbbing, and quickened his pace. Running his hand along Kyle's body as he went down on him.

"Oh god, Stan, oh fuck."

Stan started to slow down once again, which made Kyle squirm beneath him. Stan pulled away and started kissing back up his chest. He kissed up his neck towards Kyle's ear. He lingered for a moment, letting tension rise while he took small breaths.

"What do you want to do, Kyle?" he whispered seductively into his ear.

"Fuck me, oh god Stan, fuck me."

Stan jumped off the bed quickly. Kyle moved with him, sitting on the edge off the bed. Stan fumbled slightly with his own buttons. He pulled his own pants and boxers off quickly, not bothering with the teasing effect he had given Kyle.

He moved quickly and swiftly towards Kyle on the bed. Stan pressed his bare chest against Kyle's back, and kissed on his neck. He gave no warning to Kyle, gave no words. He just pushed himself, slowly into Kyle.

Kyle buried his face slowly into the bed, trying to muffle any winces he may give. He clutched the sheets in his hands, and bit the bed to keep from yelling. Stan continued kissing on his neck and he thrust fully into Kyle. Kyle kept his mind on the sweet warm kisses that Stan was placing on him. He tried relaxing, until the pain became gentler. He focused on Stan's kisses until his death clutch on the bed, became more sensual, until he could lift his head without fear of yelping out in pain.

He could feel Stan's body pressing up against his and he would push into him. Kyle was almost shaking. He still couldn't believe it was happening, still was afraid he would wake up like it was all a dream. But he could hear Stan behind him, real as day.

"Oh yeah, oh Kyle."

Suddenly Stan's movements became quicker. He thrust harder, more uncontrolled. Kyle bit his lip and moaned a little, out of pleasure and pain. Then Stan stopped, he thrust one more time into Kyle, and pushed harder trying to go even farther than before as he finished. He slowly pulled out and aggressively turned Kyle around onto his back.

Stan pressed his body to Kyle's and started kissing him, he could feel Kyle hadn't finished. His hard groin still pressed up against Stan. But Stan just laid on the bed next to Kyle. He moved his hand down on Kyle, and slowly helped Kyle finish.

"Stan,' Kyle tried to say as they sat there in silence.

But words escaped him; he had no way of expressing any emotion. All he was able to do way drift off to sleep, basking in the afterglow of what they had done. He let himself fall asleep thinking of how close he and Stan had just made themselves. His dreams overtook him as he thought of the giant step they had just taken together.

When Kyle opened his eyes, he looked to the side of him, expecting to see Stan still sleeping next to him. But Stan wasn't there. He tried sitting up, but it hurt, so he turned on his side and looked around the room. Stan's clothes were gone, Kyle's were folded and in a neat pile on the computer desk.

Kyle got up slowly, being careful of the pain he was feeling. He walked carefully over to the desk and started putting his clothes back on. He felt strange waking up alone. He looked around for a note, or something that could explain where Stan had gone. But there was nothing in the room.

Kyle grabbed his phone, there was a small red light flashing from it. He looked at the text he had received, it was from Stan. Kyle felt relief knowing he hadn't just left with no reason. Suddenly Kyle remembered it was the school week and Stan had sports he had to go to.

Kyle walked back to Stan's bed and plopped down. He thought about just staying until Stan got home. Kyle looked at the clock; he had slept through most of Stan's practice. Plus going home when he could barely stand might appear weird to his mother. He had all of his school work done, so he figured he might as well just relax.

Stan's parents wouldn't mind him being there, if they even took any notice of him. And it could be a nice surprise to Stan that Kyle would stay and wait for him. Kyle placed his head on Stan's pillow and thought about what they had just done. He went over every detail in his head. The images played back in his head with crisp clean vision. He saw everything in his mind as if it was all happening again.

Kyle could help but smile. He had come over thinking they might break up. But a fight was all they needed to push themselves to the next level of their relationship. Kyle couldn't keep the smile off his face. The day had been so hectic, so full of uncertainty. Then it was like the heavens came together and sang.

Kyle looked around Stan's room, just observing. It hadn't changed much since middle school. There weren't pictures on the walls anymore. But it was the same shade of dark blue. He had the same furniture, and it was all arranged the same. The bookshelf in the corner had less books than before, now it was more of a trophy case. Filled with little trophy men holding baseball bats, or footballs, men above to dive. There were plaques propped up with his scores, his places, his times. The entire shelf was a shrine to Stan. His room was messy. There were clothes on the floor, and uniforms. His closet had piles falling out of it. His computer desk looked like a food graveyard.

A sense to clean came over Kyle. But he knew Stan like his room like a pig sty. It was one thing they would have to learn to compromise on. Kyle thought about maybe just throwing the old food away, or shoving the closet back into the actual closet. It was all almost too much, the room didn't seem livable to Kyle.

All he could bring himself to do was close his eyes and go back to sleep. He knew the mess wouldn't be gone when he woke up. But he hoped Stan would be back.

It was nine o'clock by the time Stan walked back in his room. He had eaten, showered, and changed. He saw Kyle sleeping on his bed, fully dressed. Stan walked as quietly as he could, moving around the items on his floor to the bed. He laid down next to Kyle and wrapped his arm around him. His pajamas pressed against Kyle's clothes. He kissed his shoulder lightly and closed his eyes.

"I love you." He heard Kyle say.

Stan turned Kyle around, smiling at him. He had a long night without him. He had made big leaps for their relationship. He wanted to be able to cuddle up and just go to sleep. He knew in his heart he had to say something back, but there was a part of him that didn't want to say anything.

"Love you too." He managed to get out.

Kyle kissed him goodnight.

"I have to go home." Kyle said as he got up.

Stan said goodnight and turned in his bed to sleep. Kyle walked out of the room with no words, he just walked all the way home listening to the beauty of the night.

**A.N.**_ So there it was. Chapter 5, I hope you all liked it enough to __**read and review**__!_


	6. Quiet Night At Home

**A.N.**_ So this is chapter six. I'm really, really sorry for the wait but I just moved back into my dorm room and I had to get use to it and had a lot of activities to go to. I don't own this it's based on Bare, you know who owns the characters._

Kyle watched him changing. He was silent while he watched. Observing how Stan would stare in the mirror, turn to the right and make his decision about an outfit. He watched how careful Stan was, a cautious look on his face for every outfit.

"What do you think of this one?"

Kyle looked over the outfit. It looked like every other thing Stan had put on, a polo and jeans.

"It looks preppy."

"Shit," Stan sighed, "What do you wear to a party like this?"

_Nothing _Kyle thought. He still couldn't believe Stan was going. With all Stan had going on, this party could get busted and get everyone in trouble.

"Are you sure you want to go?" Kyle asked.

"Hell yeah, it's not every day Token throws a party. It's going to be wild. People will be on like five different drugs at once. Besides what else is there to do?"

"Stay home, with me. Where we are all alone. Where we can be together without you worrying. What's wrong with that?"

Stan pulled his polo over his head and grabbed a regular tee shirt. He pulled it on; it was black with white lettering. He looked nice, Kyle smiled at his appearance.

"I don't want to be home. You could come to Token's too, if you wanted."

Kyle sighed, leaning back on the bed. He and Stan had been through the same conversation five times that day.

"Why would I want to go to a party with you where I can't hold your hand, let alone be close to you?"

Stan sighed and walked towards Kyle. He kissed him, gently then harder as the kiss continued. Kyle leaned forward when he ended the kiss, not wanting him to be done.

"Because you know and understand why we can't act like that in public. Come on, just come with me."

Kyle shook his head. A party didn't sound appealing to him. He could drink or eat anything without checking his blood sugar. And people just act stupid when they get drunk. He didn't want to be around the drugs, or the people doing them. South Park itself was a boring and dull town, but the kids could get insane.

There was such a huge chance the cops would get called, especially in Token's neighborhood. The rich old people he lives by were sure to call the police with some noise complaint.

"It just doesn't sound like a great idea to me. Maybe I'll come by later. I'll swing by to walk home with you, that way you don't catch attention wander the streets."

"God, mom…" Stan joked.

Kyle didn't think the joke was that funny. He was concerned for legitimate reasons. Reasons that Stan decided to ignore. There could be serious side effects to going out, and Kyle didn't understand what was wrong with staying home together.

It had been three weeks since they slept together. Stan hadn't made any moves since, and any moves Kyle had tried to make Stan stopped. Kyle had been in an afterglow for days, but the afterglow had disappeared and was replaced by lust. Kyle lusted for Stan's touch, the closeness he had felt, the intimacy.

Stan had said once that he didn't just want to do it again. He wanted it to be something special, something unexpected. But Kyle didn't care about special right now, just doing it would be special to him.

"Come on, stay with me. We'll have a special night all alone." Kyle pleaded.

Stan ignored him, as he often did when the subject of sex came up. Kyle was sick of always being ignored. It wasn't like he was some sex fiend, he wasn't only trying to get in Stan's pants. They were dating and he longed to feel close to him. Kyle knew there would be no talking him out of going out, he knew that at best Stan might come home early and surprise him.

Kyle found himself getting upset, more upset than before. He was more sexually frustrated than before they had sex. He didn't want Stan to go out. He also didn't want to be left all alone waiting in Stan's room for Stan to come back. Kyle felt ditched, even though they hadn't had solid plans for the night, he didn't want to be left alone.

Stan finally emerged from his closet, wearing the same jeans and black tee shirt, he walked over and sat on the bed next to Kyle. He didn't make any physical contact, he didn't even look at Kyle.

"Listen if you really want to we can do stuff tonight when I get back."

Kyle jumped from the bed, spitting out a laugh in the process. He put his hand over his mouth and almost squeezed his face. He looked back at Stan who seemed utterly oblivious to what was wrong.

"Thank you," Kyle said sarcastically, "I can't wait to have really meaningful sex after you come home on, how many drugs did you say? Oh yeah five. If you actually think I'm going to try to have sex with you while you're drugged up and drunk off your ass you are so stupid. And I say try for a reason, because you would be incapable of doing anything.

Hell, maybe you won't even be alive. People are going to die at this party. There's a reason drugs are illegal. And you're for sure not supposed to drink while you're doing drugs. So, if I can even get you home alive what makes you think I would want to have sex?

Oh even better, you'll have sex tonight but I won't. Because you'll be in jail. Going to the snobbiest neighborhood in South Park to throw the biggest party of the year isn't smart. Those damn old people are going to call the cops and get you all arrested. And Token isn't going to save your ass. Hell he'll hand each and every one of you in, just to keep himself from jail. So have fun getting ass raped because you wanted to have a fun night." Kyle yelled at Stan then sat down in the computer chair and turned away from him.

"Listen I am going. You can be a bitch about it all you want. Have a fun night at home. I'll see you when you come get me."

Stan grabbed his jacket from his bed and walked towards his bedroom door. Just as Kyle was about to turn around and say bye he heard the door slam. Kyle brought his hand to his mouth and started biting his fingernails as he thought of everything that could happen that night.

He started thinking maybe Stan was tricking him. He didn't actually want to go to the party. Any moment Stan would reappear. Ask if the fight had been big enough to make up yet. Then they'd spend the night together.

But that dream was dashed by the sound of the front door, slamming harder than the bedroom door. Kyle went to the window and watched as Stan threw his jacket on over his tee shirt. As he walked away from the house he kicked at the ground angrily. He wasn't turning back, it wasn't a joke. He was really going to the party.

Kyle didn't know what he could do. He had spent plenty of nights alone before. But staying at Stan's all alone, the only thing to do would be sleep. But sleeping on Stan's bed would remind him of the night they had sex. It seemed like Stan's room was full of memories that prevented Kyle from doing anything but sitting in the computer chair.

When Stan asked Kyle over that afternoon Kyle didn't think his night would be so quiet. If he closed his eyes he could hear y the harsh winters wind pounding on the window. He heard a buzzing from the computer, and a buzz from the lights in the room. If he listened really carefully he could hear movement in other parts of the house.

He heard Shelly, three rooms down, crying to herself. He could hear Sharon throwing things around the kitchen. The only person he didn't hear was Randy, who was most likely just sitting how Kyle was.

Kyle didn't understand how Stan came from these people. He didn't believe Stan could actually be related to them. They never went out, never did anything. They always just sat around the house, doing whatever came to mind.

Whereas Stan always had to be moving, never wanted to stand still. In classes he would tap his feet or his fingers just to have some form of movement. To Stan a night at home was the end of the world. Parts of Kyle wondered if his family used to be crazy. Maybe his parents used up all their wild and crazy days when they were young.

The thought gave Kyle hope, a hope that maybe one day Stan would get bored with crazy parties and drinking. He wouldn't find going out every night to be as fun as it used to be. And maybe, just maybe, he'd want to stay in with Kyle. It would be a wonderful day, if Stan changed his mind about things.

Kyle felt his phone vibrate and pulled it from his pocket.

Sender; Ken M.

Received; 7:32pm

Hey dude, what are you doing?

'Nothing. Just sitting here, at Stan's alone.'

Creepy dude, get a life, just joking. Want to come over?

'Can't. I have to pick Stan up later. And I have work to do till then.'

Boring. I have Kenny, even though Mindi's out of the hospital. She texted me, asked me to keep him so she could go out.

'Weird, another party?'

Probably. Well since my best friend is a loser I guess I'll be a loser and stay at home too.

'Wish Stan would think like that, ha.'

Well text me if you get too bored, Kenny loves you if you want to come say hi to him. See you later.

Kyle put his phone down and looked at the time; 8:13pm. Kenny hadn't been very good about texting back. He was probably distracted by little Ken. But Kyle was glad he wasted away almost an hour of his time.

He moved towards Stan's bed, memories filling his head with hot images of Stan. He started feeling bad for not going out. At least he could have seen Stan, could have been in the same room with him. He could have imagined what it would be like if Stan would be open around people.

If he had gone to the party, Stan may have gotten very open around people, if he got drunk enough. Kyle didn't know one friend of theirs who would truly mind, sure they'd be teased, but it would all be joking. There wasn't anyone in school that would hate them because they were in love.

It was a great thing to be in love. People in the pitiful town they lived in search for it for their whole lives without any results. Most people settle for someone and say their life turned out good. They had something to be envious of, they had found love and didn't let it slip by them. They would sleep in each other's embrace knowing they were the only people in town who would ever experience something like that.

Kyle could understand being worried, but he didn't think there was anything to be afraid of. Then without warning a feeling overtook him, the feeling to prove to Stan that they shouldn't be afraid. Kyle grabbed his phone, and quickly left the room. His destination was clear in his mind, Token's house, and mission, to prove to Stan people didn't care either way how they felt about each other.

**A.N. **_There you have it. I hope it was worth the wait. I'll try to write a lot in the next few weeks to make up for how long I kept you waiting._


	7. Rolling

**A.N. **_I don't own anything, the character's are all South Park's and the story is based off of Bare._

Kyle shivered in the cold night air. He hadn't been prepared for a long walk. Token's house was on the outskirts of town. Most people would walk there during the summer to hang out, but walking alone, at night, in the winter could be dangerous. The outskirts of town were filled with winding roads, known to cause accidents. There was no shoulder, just ditches to the side of the road.

If a car ran a turn quickly, Kyle's only defense would be to jump into a ditched that was god knows how deep and filled with god only knows what. Every turn there was a gravel road that led to one neighborhood. These were the homes of the doctors and scientist, or people who considered themselves North Parkers.

Kyle started to jog, hoping to keep his body temperature up. His jeans kept his legs as warm as they could, while his long sleeve shirt seemed to get thinner and thinner as he walked. He suddenly wished that he had kept that old hat of his. Then his ears wouldn't be turning blue.

He glanced at the street sign in front of him, Flint Way, which meant he had about a half a mile left to go. Kyle started thinking of city kids, children who would think the walk to Token's was unbearable in any circumstances. Yet, South Park kids would walk miles just to sit at a pond. Kyle was glad he wasn't out of shape. Cartman used to fall behind just a quarter of a mile into a walk, Kyle had always been one of the people to keep going.

When Token's neighborhood was in view Kyle could already hear the music. There wasn't a chance for him to turn back now, but part of him got very afraid of the cops. He couldn't stand the thought of having a record. But he had a mission, and no one turns back on missions.

Token's house was filled with loud sounds and people. As Kyle turned on to Flint Hill St. he could already see people practically pouring out of the home. Of course Token's party was sure to be big. He was friends with the North Parkers too. And while South Park had a high school capacity of 476, the other town had a senior class of 400. Which meant Token probably had over 500 people invading his parents mansion.

"God damn it." Kyle said.

He hadn't realized just how big a party could get. Now he wasn't even sure if he would be able to find Stan, or any place where he could tell him what he was feeling. The party was so packed he had trouble walking in the door. It became a maze to move from one place to another.

Lights were flashing everywhere, music blared over speakers, and the people were going crazy. Kyle watched as everyone danced up on everyone, it was like a kissing orgy, though it would probably lead to a real orgy in time.

The air was filled with smoke, which changed colors as the lights did. It was like a real movie party. One of those things where the rich kids get their house destroyed and no one seems to care. They never get caught, even though it's obvious what is going on. And in the movies even when they get caught everyone just runs away, no harm, no foul.

Kyle hoped that was how the party would continue. He needed the cops to stay away, at least until he could find Stan. He didn't care one way or another if the party got busted once he had Stan out.

Kyle pulled out his phone, it was almost ten. He knew Stan wouldn't want to leave this early if he did find him soon. In a perfect world, for Kyle, Stan would be so thrilled to see him that they would just leave together. But Kyle knew reality from make believe, he knew Stan would want to stay late.

As Kyle turned a corner a young girl blew smoke into his face. He started coughing, waving his hands around in the air, as if it would make the smoke go away. This young girl, probably only fifteen, was passing around a joint looking like she was dying to fit in.

Kyle could remember a time when he wanted nothing more than to fit in. During middle school, when he was so afraid of who he was. Not feeling comfortable in his own skin he tried everything else he could. He group hopped, trying to seem like a cool kid to everyone. This young girl wanted to fit in, if only for a night. And in the process she was going to kill her lungs and some brain cells. Kyle felt pity for her, wished he could get her to see that she is who she is.

By the time his mind wandered away from the girl he was walking up stairs. People kept shoving things at him, he kept declining. It was as if everyone was unaware of everything that was going on around them, unless they had a drink, or some drug to be offered. Kyle started wishing he could find Stan before he got pulled into too many things. Stan was just as desperate as anyone to fit in, he wouldn't think about how using too many things at once could kill him.

He turned into the upstairs living room slowly, the doors were half closed, scaring him slightly. He was worried about what he might see, but he had to search for Stan. It was ten thirty by the time he wandered his way to the living room.

Stan was sitting on the couch, looking drunk as ever. His shirt was ripped, and his jeans were stained. Kyle figured he'd be pissed about that once he came to. But when Stan saw Kyle his face lit up. He smiled a huge pearly smile. Kyle was surprised by the large hug that Stan gave him.

"Hey," Stan slurred, "You came."

"I decided I'd rather be with you. No matter what we're doing."

Stan continued smiling, it was as if Kyle had made his night. Kyle couldn't help but smile back at Stan, his insides were flipping at the thought of Stan showing excitement over him.

They sat together, with the other South Park seniors. All of their friends had retreated from the craziness of the party. It was as if they were hiding out. Token was the only one missing, he was downstairs yelling about what to touch, and what to put down. Kyle almost felt bad for how much work the party was for his friend.

The other boys and girls they were with were slowly falling out of their buzz. Their sentences started making more sense, and they stopped slurring their words. Stan's touchy feely mood started to sway, but Kyle was determined to do small things to show they were okay.

When Bebe put on some music, they all started dancing together. Kyle stayed close to Stan's side, as if there was no one else in the room. Stan smiled, dancing with Kyle. But what Kyle didn't notice was that everyone was dancing with everyone, there were no couples, no groups formed. They had all meshed together into a kind of mosh pit of dancers.

It started getting later, the dancing was slowing down, not to a halt. But people were starting to get tired. Wendy was asleep in a corner, Bebe was leaning on Craig. The once drunk teens were feeling the side effects of their party. And one by one they were dropping off like flies.

"We should get going soon." Kyle whispered close to Stan's ear.

"Yeah, soon."

Kyle leaned in towards Stan. He wanted to kiss him, just quickly. To finally prove, without a doubt no one would care. But Stan pulled away. He grabbed Kyle's hand and led him away from the others.

"Follow me, I need some air."

**A.N.**_ Hey you guys. Really sorry about the wait again. I am visiting home from school and finally found some time to write. I realize the chapters are getting a little shorter, and that's because a lot of these chapters are about small plot issues. I don't want to overwrite the story to where there is too much for you over nothing. Although every chapter I write has a point and has something to do with the plot even if you don't know it, I don't want to push small details. Please Read and Review, they keep me going…_


	8. Best Kept Secret

**A.N. **_Hey you guys. Once again don't own the characters and the plot is based off of Bare._

Stan pulled Kyle down the winding road. He pulled him away from the party, out of sight from the people surrounding the house. They walked far away, all the way down the road, Stan pulling Kyle all the way. As they turned a corner Stan finally stopped his fast paced walking.

He pulled Kyle to him; he reached for his face and took Kyle's lips in his own. The kiss was soft and gentle. Kyle couldn't taste alcohol on his breath. Stan's hands moved over Kyle's sides.

Headlights lit up the road and Stan jumped away, almost landing in the ditch. Kyle walked to the side of the road and waves as the car passed. He gave Stan his hand and pulled him back to the road.

"You couldn't kiss me inside?"

"Like I said, I needed some air." Stan said looking away from Kyle completely.

"Yeah good clean air, about a quarter of a mile away from every person we know. The air's really clean here on this road at midnight, but it's not good air at Token's house."

Kyle was pissed, more because Stan didn't seem to understand no one would care. Kyle could see in their eyes, all of the seniors noticed how close he and Stan had danced. But no one said anything, no one gave them dirty looks because no one cared.

Stan was so focused on how he viewed the world, he couldn't see any other way for things to be. Kyle was trying to make him see the good part of life. Trying to force an optimistic view of people in his eyes. But it seemed like Stan only saw what he wanted to see, not what was truly there.

"Yeah, yeah I heard you." Kyle said feeling defeated.

Stan could see Kyle's devastated look. He could see all of the hurt and betrayal. Stan also knew he had gone back on his word. All those years ago when they first got together, he had made Kyle a promise, that by graduation everyone would know. But Stan had no intention of telling the people of South Park about his relationship.

"I know this world could have a place for us, in a fantasy. But reality is give and take. You take what you get, and give time a chance. We have to wait until this damn town is fast asleep. Cause while their awake, it's best kept secret."

Kyle grabbed Stan's hands. He knew how much Stan believed in those words. He could tell Stan had no faith in their small town. Kyle felt like his heart was being ripped to shreds every time Stan talked about keeping their secret.

They had been open with each other for years. Yet they were still so hidden. Kyle didn't think they could truly see what it was like being in a relationship until other people knew about them. He felt so trapped, and all he wanted was to feel like the world knew who he was again.

Kyle was afraid of hiding, but Stan relished in it. Stan had become one of the popular kids in high school; he was wanted by most of the girls. While Kyle fell behind, into the shadows. Kyle didn't want to be hidden by darkness, he wanted his life full of light, full of happiness, and full of Stan.

"Al I ever want is in your eyes, they tell me I'm all right and I realize it's true. We whisper words while we're alone at night, I want to hear them in the morning light. With love on our side, maybe we'll be all right."

Stan dropped Kyle's hands. All Kyle could do was run his hands through his hair. He walked down the road, towards the small town. Stan was following, slowly and far behind, but still following. Kyle stopped, suddenly, Stan jumped slightly.

Kyle dropped his head back, looking up to the sky. He reached his arms out to his sides, with his hands raised to the night sky above them.

"Beneath a million stars there no need to pretend. I look around tonight and wonder why we can't end," Kyle trailed off. He stopped looking to the sky and then his eyes were all on Stan, "the best kept secret."

Stan walked towards him, slowly. He kept a distance between them as if he was scared of getting close. All Stan did was look up at Kyle, no emotions in his eyes.

"It's best kept secret." Stan whispered as if the sentence itself was the secret.

Stan tried walking closer to Kyle, who didn't seem interested in being close. He reached out his hands and ran his fingers through Kyle's soft red curls. All Kyle could do was break away.

He was sick of Stan's excuses. Kyle couldn't find any solid information behind why Stan wanted it to be a secret in the first place. Most people in elementary had predicted that the two super best friends would be gay for each other. They had been all talked about it when they were younger.

But now, now that it was real. Now that they really did fall in love with each other, now it was a problem for Stan. The boy who used to be so secure with himself he would joke that to love his best friend would be great. Yet, now that he really did he couldn't tell anyone about it.

Kyle hadn't forgotten Stan's promise to him. He could still remember the words, that everyone in town would know before graduation. Everyone in their stupid small town would know about their love before they had to leave for college.

Kyle knew, deep down in his heart that Stan didn't mean to tell anyone. He knew all Stan wanted to do was get away from the people that knew them when they were growing up. He wanted to start anew, without the worry of what their childhood friends would think. But Kyle couldn't find realism in that train of thinking. People would find out, and being away wouldn't make it any less difficult.

"Didn't you see how no one in there cared, they saw us dancing. They saw us, yet not a word was said about it," Kyle started spiting his sentences venomously to Stan as he got angry, "You need to give the world a chance." He yelled.

Stan almost laughed. He walked passed Kyle going towards the town and away from the party, that in his mind, started the fight.

"A chance to what?" Stan yelled the question of irony back to Kyle.

Stan continued walking away from Kyle, leaving him alone in the dark of the road. Kyle followed determined to continue with the conversation. The way that Kyle saw it was that Stan was hiding. Not only from coming out to their families, friends, and the town. Stan was hiding from himself, Kyle was starting to wonder if Stan even felt like he was ready to admit it to himself that he was gay.

Kyle's mind started reeling as he followed Stan back towards town. If Stan didn't want to come out maybe it wasn't because he didn't want to admit it to the town. It could just be he didn't want to admit it to himself. Coming out would mean truly becoming gay, being known as a gay boy. Maybe Stan just didn't believe it enough yet to be known as gay by everyone.

Stan stopped as they almost got back into the heart of South Park. They had walked in silence for a good twenty minutes. Kyle was surprised when Stan turned back to him. He kept walking till they met, Stan looked at him with cold eyes. Eyes that frightened Kyle.

"You go ahead and give the world a chance, and find out on your own just how deep this town can cut."

Stan shoved Kyle, pushing his shoulder back. Kyle was knocked off balance and had to stumble to keep from falling. Stan didn't know his own strength, or Kyle's true weakness. But his words had shoved Kyle as well. When he had taken the step to turn and say something, Kyle hadn't assumed it would be just another heart breaking sentence of the night.

Stan grabbed both of Kyle's shoulders, which kept the smaller boy standing. But then he didn't let go. He looked in Kyle's eyes, with a determined face.

"This is all a fantasy," Kyle could only imagine Stan meant the party and how people had acted that night, "then we go back to school. Will you just think it through?" Stan yelled in his face.

Kyle broke away from Stan. He felt so tired, tired of all of Stan's crap. They had fought on the issue every month for years. Every time the fight came up Kyle had new points, new issues. But Stan always had the same thing to say. Kyle was sick of listening and agreeing with him being so close-minded.

People who act how Stan was acting, that's who Kyle thought they had to be worried about. The close-minded people of South Park. He didn't find any harm in their friends, or their families. It was the idiots, the hicks, the old farts of the town who couldn't wrap their minds around a new idea.

Kyle had trouble looking at Stan, when Stan acted like being gay was a secret they needed to keep forever, it killed Kyle inside. Having the fight again after the party wasn't part of Kyle's plan.

"I think it through and then you shut me out. You're such a coward!"

Kyle almost regretted the words as he yelled them for the whole street to hear. They we're at the end of the road, near town. Their houses weren't far away, but they still had to walk together. Still had more of this fight coming at them.

Kyle waited for Stan, he waited for him to make the next move. Kyle was used to waiting on Stan to make a decision for them.

But this time it was different, this time Stan was moving slowly. Stan was thinking, brooding. He was quiet, each step he took was very deliberate, he meant to intimidate Kyle. Kyle couldn't deny that he was slightly frightened. Stan was larger than him, in height and muscle, it was scary to see him in such a way.

Stan moved close to Kyle, towering over him. His eyes were cold, heartless. He looked like a broken man. Someone who's whole life had come crashing down, years before it's time.

"And you're a fool."

Stan spit the words into Kyle's face with a menacing tone. He didn't look happy, if anything he looked like he was ending their relationship right then and there.

They both stood, silently, observing the night. Taking in everything that had been said. Their moods started to ease. The tension that surrounded them started to fade. They both looked around the same town, walking towards their homes.

As their moods changed Kyle reached out for Stan. He held his hand in his own, squeezing it slightly. Stan returned the squeeze, but half-heartedly.

"You know we can't go on forever this way…" Kyle said turning towards Stan.

"All this 'forever,' can't you live for today?"

It was a good rebuttal, one Stan had never used before. But it wasn't something Kyle was interested in. He was looking towards the future, hoping for strength and guidance. Stan was living in the moment, not caring where they ended up. Kyle needed to know they were going somewhere; he needed to know there was a reason for everything they were going through.

Kyle ran his palm across Stan's cheek. He smiled at him, it was a bittersweet look. Stan looked at him with a twinkle in his eye. It was as if he was saying; don't say another word, don't go on, stop while you're ahead. But Kyle felt like there was so much more for them to talk about that they had never gotten into.

"It's time to grow up." Kyle whispered sadly to Stan.

Kyle said sighing at Stan. They were going to be graduating soon. Then they'd be off to college, where they had to be in charge of their own lives. There they couldn't allow the people around them to keep them hidden. Kyle needed Stan to understand they had big steps they had to take.

"There's so much more to love." Kyle said.

"It's best kept secret."

Stan tried once more; hoping this time the words would stick to Kyle's brain. He was just as tired of the fight as Kyle, but was sure his answer was correct. He felt he truly knew the people of South Park, and he didn't think they could handle it.

"The best kept secret of all…" Kyle trailed off.

They stood together at the crossroads for their streets. There was space between them, each standing in front of their own street. They stood in silence, looking at one another. Kyle's remark stung at Stan, just as everything they had said hung above them in the air, like a cloud over the evening.

"I love you Stan."

"Wait," Kyle heard as he started to turn onto his street, "come over, stay the night with me."

Kyle walked over to Stan, he still wasn't happy, still wasn't over everything. Yet, he moved to Stan and embraced him. They walked together to Stan's house, not a word said between them the whole way there.

**A.N. **_So I am posting this one right after the last update because I feel they go hand in hand. I have only one chapter written after this point so now I have to hope I get going. Which may take a while because I head back up to school pretty soon… I'm so sorry about how long this is taking everyone. I had hopes of finishing before I even left for school. I'm really slacking._


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